Drunken Writer Musings

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Note to future self in the future: do not delete. I feel really, really good about this! (She said, as if drunk on Felix Felicis.)

(Oh, okay, future self, it goes under a cut, hmph.)

Soooo like I was writing a serial about a detective, and it was set in Seattle, and you know, I didn’t want to do anything TOO TOO crazy, so I never ever ever alluded to the dude’s ethnicity. Anyways, it needed to be revamped in a lotta different ways, so it’s being rewritten, but unfortunately I’m going to piss off any former readers of said serial, or at least I feel I will.

Fiiiirst off, the detective dude, oh let’scallhimout, Arcady, he is actually Chinese-American. I have always wanted to read an American mystery where the detective was both Asian and actually spoke English like he was born in America, which in fact, he is (and so were his parents and … we’ll get to the rest of ffaaamily tree innext point). I really hate the guts of the You No Take Candle trope. I really hate it. Like I would actually go cap the knees of any writers who took applied that trope to 100% of their Asian Americans if I had infinite time and space and infinite amounts of alcohol. That INCLUDES writers I LOVE, sorry people.

In the rewrite, this will actually be alluded to. Well. Maybe more than. I figure if people can talk about their Scottish ancestry, they can damn well talk about their Chinese/Japanese ancestry (it’s a REALLY unfortunate ancestry in terms of familial approval back when the grandparents got together. “*great-gramama sniff* At least he isn’t Vietnamese.”).

Seeeeecond of all, I always kinda wanted it to take place in Near Future SeatleTM, because I just am that crazy, and it gives more legs to the family tree, but mostly because I want Mysteries with Possibilities of Near Earth Spaaace, and frankly the way NASA is going right now, I ain’t gonna get even “things going to the moon on a regular basis” without going either Near Future or alternate Present, and alternate universeseses give me headaches unless they allow Uhura to fuck Spock. ((Actually I am unclear as to whether Uhura and Spock had an actual thing in the “old” timeline or not. I hope they did.)) Which this wouldn’t. So Near Future it is!

Or at least, I wanted it to, except that SF anything puts people off soooo fast unless they’re in SF/F alredy and even so it’s still a mystery and blah blah blah, I got lazy and scared, and it was never gonna be art, so I thought, let’s just write what we knoow. In that writerly waai.

*blink* OMG, there really could be an Asian-American president if it was SF! So definitely SF it is!

(update: OMG it’s better because LOLcat will be an established IntelliBreed! In my world, at least!)

Anyways, I know people who was reading the thing earlier are gonna be most pissed about that second bit.

Thiiiird of all, the other guy in this team of two, letscallhimout too, Zene, isn’t of Northern European descent, but I don’t know what he is, but he was never so. He was always of light brownish hue in my mind. I wonder if people will say, “Why is it so weird that you just knew he wasn’t white and didn’t have a specific ‘color’ excuse me ‘ethnic background’?” Well kinda like you write a guy and you know he’s white but you don’t know if he’s Scottish, English, Canadian, Russian, Finnish, etc. etc. etc. Actually there are too many characters like that in the literary world already.

I don’t even know why he is of light brownish hue. Why does your character have red hair? Writer subsconsciousesses are weeird places to be. Pity any friends, neighbors, or relatives whom we even vaguely vaguely remember.

I hafta research more/write more and figure it out. Loooots more of each I think. And then there will be more rewriting!

SO!

Asyoucanimagine, lots of things being rewritten and replotted along the lines of where theyshuda been. ALSO! Nick Mamatas, you were totally right about the multiple influences thing.

SO MUCH TO REWRITE!!!!

And possibly to little to no effect!!

But dammit, I always wanted a handsome Asian-American man who could play the violin (NOT BECAUSE HE’S ASIAN) and loved Sherlock Holmes and spoke fluent *multiple languages* with an American English accent. Hubba hubba. Meow.

And scene.

Thiss misspelt drunken with RANDOM CAPSLOCK rant brought to you by too much Chamomile Citrus, where the author finds out that non-dust-power chamomile actually does have a sorta sedative effect that is not negliblble. ble. ble.

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4 thoughts on “Drunken Writer Musings

  1. I’m not a previous reader of the serial, but I have been waiting for a handsome Asian American leading man for a long time…I picked up a romance this year where the author was described as:

    1) having long dark hair
    2) being dark, compact, and handsome.
    3) being from Seattle & working for a family-owned business founded by his dad & uncle in the ’50s
    4) practicing martial arts with his cousin & playing with his katana.

    AND THEN IT TURNED OUT HE WAS WHITE. I was so disappointed. WTH? I should have stopped with the Katana scene because the author described it as Korean and I should have just known nothing good was coming.

  2. You’re right, I meant main character. Did Not ReRead Before Posting.

    Also, thanks for the link to tvtropes, i’d never read it and now i’m sucked in.

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