Boring work dreams, which the cows finished eating a few moments after I woke up. Last night I took some trouble to tuck in Large Round Cow and Cozy Cow so that they were right next to me. The Overcow was closest, on the door side of the bed. Ike sat on the top of the wedge.
This seems a pretty good arrangement.
In other news, my boss keeps telling me that other people on the team don’t think I’m worthless, that senior management (including the dude who winked at Ike, OMG) thinks highly of me, for now we should concentrate on my strengths, and we’ll figure out specific ways to deal with the vacation days I’m whittling away, and no one is going to fire me.
And as my department has a long history of being harsh with criticism, this surprised me quite a bit. Although it may just be that I hold the keys to certain vaults that need to stay closed lest dragons eat the databases, but still.
I’m just keeping swimming as best I can. I know, and warned my manager, that I may or may not end up in a pile of splooge next week. Birthdays… I wish I’d known about triggers back then.
Of course, I’d kept putting off the day of finally splitting from my parents, no matter how insane and scary they were at that point, and the birthday made it a clincher. If there was a day more symbolic to kill me… well, my subconscious must have known it, because I didn’t.
My subconscious ended up handling a lot of things I couldn’t.