The ladies of Longbourn soon waited on those of Netherfield. The visit was soon returned in due form. Miss Bennet’s pleasing manners grew on the goodwill of Mrs. Hurst and Miss Bingley; and though the mother was found to be intolerable, and the younger sisters not worth speaking to, a wish of being better acquainted with them was expressed towards the two eldest. By Jane, this attention was received with the greatest pleasure, but Elizabeth still saw superciliousness in their treatment of everybody, hardly excepting even her sister, and could not like them; though their kindness to Jane, such as it was, had a value as arising in all probability from the influence of their brother’s admiration. It was generally evident whenever they met, that he did admire her and to her it was equally evident that Jane was yielding to the preference which she had begun to entertain for him from the first, and was in a way to be very much in love; but she considered with pleasure that it was not likely to be discovered by the world in general, since Jane united, with great strength of feeling, a composure of temper and a uniform cheerfulness of manner which would guard her from the suspicions of the impertinent. She mentioned this to her friend Miss Lucas.
There’s something about the intertwining of the three mindsets here—the side of Mrs. Hurst and Miss Bingley, that of Jane, and that of Elizabeth—that’s a little complicated to work through. “…but she considered with pleasure…” seems like it could refer to either Elizabeth or Jane, which changes the meaning depending on which way you take it. Not so much a pitfall of omniscient as a pitfall of pronouns; otherwise, this paragraph would have been a perfect demonstration of how to do omniscient right.
And now we’re going to hit the dialogue fast and hard. It’s no wonder that Austen books make such good movies; dialogue is what carries the day.
“It may perhaps be pleasant,” replied Charlotte, “to be able to impose on the public in such a case; but it is sometimes a disadvantage to be so very guarded. If a woman conceals her affection with the same skill from the object of it, she may lose the opportunity of fixing him; and it will then be but poor consolation to believe the world equally in the dark. There is so much of gratitude or vanity in almost every attachment, that it is not safe to leave any to itself. We can all begin freely—a slight preference is natural enough; but there are very few of us who have heart enough to be really in love without encouragement. In nine cases out of ten a woman had better show more affection than she feels. Bingley likes your sister undoubtedly; but he may never do more than like her, if she does not help him on.”
Charlotte feels a lot like a partial author insert, through which Austen speaks to her characters directly when she’s not speaking to us sublimely. I don’t find anything bad with respect to this, it just amuses me as a narrative construct.
“But she does help him on, as much as her nature will allow. If I can perceive her regard for him, he must be a simpleton, indeed, not to discover it too.”
“Remember, Eliza, that he does not know Jane’s disposition as you do.”
“But if a woman is partial to a man, and does not endeavour to conceal it, he must find it out.”
“Perhaps he must, if he sees enough of her. But, though Bingley and Jane meet tolerably often, it is never for many hours together; and, as they always see each other in large mixed parties, it is impossible that every moment should be employed in conversing together. Jane should therefore make the most of every half-hour in which she can command his attention. When she is secure of him, there will be more leisure for falling in love as much as she chooses.”
“Your plan is a good one,” replied Elizabeth, “where nothing is in question but the desire of being well married, and if I were determined to get a rich husband, or any husband, I dare say I should adopt it. But these are not Jane’s feelings; she is not acting by design. As yet, she cannot even be certain of the degree of her own regard nor of its reasonableness. She has known him only a fortnight. She danced four dances with him at Meryton; she saw him one morning at his own house, and has since dined with him in company four times. This is not quite enough to make her understand his character.”
“Not as you represent it. Had she merely dined with him, she might only have discovered whether he had a good appetite; but you must remember that four evenings have also been spent togther—and four evenings may do a great deal.”
No head-hopping here to confuse the reader; it’s full-out dialogue. In other words, this is full-out show rather than the tell we’ve been getting previously.
“Yes; these four evenings have enabled them to ascertain that they both like Vingtun better than Commerce; but with respect to any other leading characteristic, I do not imagine that much has been unfolded.”
“Well,” said Charlotte, “I wish Jane success with all my heart; and if she were married to him to-morrow, I should think she had as good a chance of happiness as if she were to be studying his character for a twelvemonth. Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance. If the dispositions of the parties are ever so well known to each other or ever so similar beforehand, it does not advance their felicity in the least. They always continue to grow sufficiently unlike afterwards to have their share of vexation; and it is better to know as little as possible of the defects of the person with whom you are to pass you life.”
“You make me laugh, Charlotte; but it is not sound. You know it is not sound, and that you woould never act in this way yourself.”
Dun dun dun, foreshadowing, as well as reflection on what the courtship of Mr. and Mrs. Bennet might have been like.
Occupied in observing Mr. Bingley’s attentions to her sister, Elizabeth was far from suspecting that she was herself becomin an object of some interest in the eyes of his friend. Mr. Darcy had at first scarcely allowed her to be pretty; he had looked at her without admiration at the ball; and when they next met, he looked at her only to criticise. But no sooner had he made it clear to himself and his friends that she hardly had a good feature in her face, than he began to find it was rendered uncommonly intelligent by the beautiful expression of her dark eyes. To this discovery succeeded some others equally mortifying. Though he had detected with a critical eye more than one failure of perfect symmetry in her form, he was forced to acknowledge her figure to be light and pleasing; and in spite of his asserting that her manners were not those of the fashionable world, he was caught by their easy playfulness. Of this she was perfectly unaware; to her he was only the man who made himself agreeable nowhere, and who had not thought her handsome enough to dance with.
He began to wish to know more of her, and as a step towards conversing with her himself, attended to her conversation with others. His doing so drew her notice. It was at Sir William Lucas’s, where a large party were assembled.
We’re covering an expanse of time that would have resulted in more parties had this been show instead of tell. We’re also covering an expanse of relationship development, at least in its strange early stages when you start to realize you’re going to foolishly fall head over heels for someone. I think that the key to omniscient here is that Mr. Darcy remains effectively offscreen, even if his presence is felt and obviously influential to the story; while Elizabeth remains onscreen and the focus of attention in this chapter.
Note to self: skill with omniscient is all about distributing focus appropriately—not just willy-nilly and playing as if you’re third-person limited simultaneously for multiple characters. It’s a deeper game than third-person limited or first-person (limited).
“What does Mr. Darcy mean,” said she to Charlotte, “by listening to my conversation with Colonel Forster?”
“That is a question which Mr. Darcy only can answer.”
“But if he does it any more I shall certainly let him know that I see what he is about. He has a very satirical eye, and if I do not begin by being impertinent myself, I shall soon grow afraid of him.”
On his approaching them soon afterwards, though without seeming to have any intention of speaking, Miss Lucas defied her friend to mention such a subject to him; which immediately provoking Elizabeth to do it, she turned to him and said:
Derring-do! What’s going to happen? This is where the idea falls apart that omniscient revealing the thoughts of all involved will result in no suspense when characters meet together. After all, while the omniscient narrator can see all, it’s mindful (for the author especially) to remember that the characters themselves don’t.
This is where omniscient’s strength lies: in irony, and thus social commentary is its natural mien. If you’ve not got something larger to say about the relationships between characters than simply their existence, omniscient will not work at all; whereas it’s evident from conversations between Charlotte and Elizabeth that there is a deeper meaning at work here.
“Did you not think, Mr. Darcy, that I expressed myself uncommonly well just now, when I was teasing Colonel Forster to give us a ball at Meryton?”
“With great energy; but it is always a subject which makes a lady energetic.”
And you’ve also got to be a master of dialogue with omniscient, because you can’t head-hop into confusion city. Well, you could, but you run the risk of losing the reader. Right here is when, in a limited/tight POV, we’d drop into one character’s thoughts or another, depending on who we’re following at the moment. We know from the dialogue, lack of external reaction, and previous internal characterization through omniscient that Darcy is acting quite the cool fish.
“You are severe on us.”
“It will be her turn soon to be teased,” said Miss Lucas. “I am going to open the instrument, Eliza, and you know what follows.”
“You are a very strange creature by way of a friend!—always wanting me to play and sing before anybody and everybody! If my vanity had taken a musical turn, you would have been invaluable; but as it is, I would really rather not sit down before those who must be in the habit of hearing th very best performances.” On Miss Lucas’s persevering, however, she added, “Very well, if it must be so, it must.” And gravely glancing at Mr. Darcy, “There is a fine old saying, which everybody here is of course familiar with: ‘Keep your breath to cool your porridge’; and I shall keep mine to swell my song.”
You know, I wish I had even half of Austen’s metier here.
Her performance was pleasing, though by no means capital. After a song or two, and before she could reply to the entreaties of several that she would sing again, she was eagerly succeeded at the instrument by her sister Mary, who having, in consequence of being the only plain one in the family, worked hard for knowledge and accomplishments, was always impatient for display.
Mary had neither genius nor taste; and though vanity had given her application, it had given her likewise a pedantic air and conceited manner, which would have injured a higher degree of excellence than she had reached. Elizabeth, easy and unaffected, ha been listened to with much more pleasure, though not playing half so well; and Mary, at the end of a long concerto, was glad to purchase praise and gratitude by Scotch and Irish airs, at the request of her younger sisters, who, with some of the Lucases, and two or thre officers, joined eagerly in dancing at one end of the room.
Mr. Darcy stood near them in silent indignation at such a mode of passing the evening, to the exclusion of all conversation, and was much too engrossed by his thoughts to perceive that Sir William Lucas was his neighbour, till Sir Williams thus began:
“What a charming amusement for young people this is, Mr. Darcy! There is nothing like dancing after all. I consider it as one of the first refinements of polished society.”
The focus switches from Elizabeth to Darcy with the passage of a truly omniscient passage of Mary’s playing. With this buffer, there’s less shock, if any at all, when the focus of the camera changes. I notice now that this buffering is lacking from many examples of how omniscient is “confusing”, when it’s the handling (very poor) that causes the confusion. You can perturb any limited POV to be just as miserable, though in a different way (usually by not taking advantage of the closeness of limited POV to generate deep attachment to the specific character and the filter of the world through their eyes).
“Certainly, sir; and it has the advantage also of being in vogue amongst the less polished societies of the world. Every savage can dance.”
Sir William only smiled. “Your friend performs delightfully,” he continued after a pause, on seeing Bingley join the group; “and I doubt not that you are an adept in the science yourself, Mr. Darcy.”
“You saw me dance at Meryton, I believe, sir.”
“Yes, indeed, and received no inconsiderable pleasure from the sight. Do you often dance at St. James’s?”
“Never, sir.”
“Do you not think it would be a proper compliment to the place?”
“It is a compliment which I never pay to any place if I can avoid it.”
We can already see from the conversation patter of Elizabeth and Darcy that they share more alike than they do different. What will develop on as the book forges deeper onwards is not the attraction of two opposites, but that of two souls that reflect each other on some level. The foreshadowing is all here.
“You have a house in town, I conclude?”
Mr. Darcy bowed.
“I had once thought of fixing in town myself—for I am fond of superior society; but I did not feel quite certain that the air of London would agree with Lady Lucas.”
He paused in hopes of an answer; but his companion was not disposed to make any; and Elizabeth at that instant moving towards them, he was struck with the action of doing a very gallant thing, and called out to her:
At the same time, Elizabeth is better conditioned socially than Darcy is, and in that matter they differ. Also, delicious delicious irony.
“My dear Miss Eliza, why are you not dancing? Mr. Darcy, you must allow me to present this young lady to you as a very desireable partner. You cannot refuse to dance, I am sure when so much beauty is before you.” And, taking her hand, he would have given it to Mr. Darcy who, though extremely surprised, was not unwilling to receive it, when she instantly drew back, and said with some discomposure to Sir William:
“Indeed, sir, I have not the least intention of dancing. I entreat you not to suppose that I moved this way in order to beg for a partner.”
And the reflection again.
Mr. Darcy, with grave propriety, requested to be allowed the honour of her hand, but in vain. Elizabeth was determined; nor did Sir William at all shake her purpose by his attempt at persuasion.
“You excel so much in the dance, Miss Eliza, that it is cruel to deny me the happiness of seeing you; and though this gentleman dislikes the amusement in general, he can have no objection, I am sure, to oblige us for one half-hour.”
“Mr. Darcy is all politeness,” said Elizabeth, smiling.
Dialogue is best when it’s used as a weapon in these little wars, isn’t it? It’s at its most lively then. That seems to be a secret to wielding it with success.
“He is, indeed; but, considering the inducement, my dear Miss Eliza, we cannot wonder at his complaisance—for who would object to such a partner?”
Elizabeth looked archly, and turned away. Her resistance had not injured her with the gentleman, and he was thinking of her with some complacency, when accosted by Miss Bingley:
Ah, he’s thinking lovely thoughts about her fire, without being so crass as to actually say, “I love your fire!”
“I can gues sthe subject of your reverie.”
“I should imagine not.”
“You are considering how insupportable it would be to pass many evenings in this manner—in such society; and indeed I am quite of your opinion. I was never more annoyed! The insipidity, and yet the noise—the nothingness, and yet the self-importance of all those people! What would I give to hear your strictures on them!”
Well, la-dee-dah, Miss Buzzkill.
“Your conjecture is totally wrong, I assure you. My mind was more agreeably engaged. I have been meditating on the very great pleasure which a pair of fine eyes in the face of a pretty woman can bestow.”
Miss Bingley immediately fixed her eyes on his face, and desired he would tell her what lady had the credit of inspiring such reflections. Mr. Darcy replied with great intrepidity:
“Miss Elizabeth Bennet.”
“Miss Elizabeth Bennet!” repeated Miss Bingley. “I am all astonishment. How long has she been such a favourite?—and pray, when am I to wish you joy?”
“That is exactly the question which I expected you to ask. A lady’s imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony, in a moment. I knew you would be wishing me joy.”
Oh gods, Darcy, what an idiot you are, especially in light of the earlier conversation between Elizabeth and Charlotte.
“Nay, if you are serious about it, I shall consider the matter is aboslutely settled. You will be having a charming mother-in-law, indeed; and, of course, she will always be at Pemberley with you.”
He listened to her with perfect indifference while she chose to entertain herself in this manner; and as his composure convinced her that all was safe, her wit flowed long.
” Wit. ”
This was… quite long. But there are longer chapters up ahead. This retyping project is going to take a while.
Spontaneous ∂erivation 